Category: Life Lessons
Right Bike, Wrong Trail – an Alpine Adventure: Part III
In my last installment, my bike and I had just encountered two Spanish hikers who advised me to turn back because the trail was too dangerous to ride down. I brushed off their comments because […]
Right Bike, Wrong Trail – an Alpine Adventure: Part II
In the last installment, I was descending my first Swiss Alpine mountain bike ride, and things were not going as planned. Eventually I popped out near the hotel where I had initially caught the bus. […]
Stealth Teflon – the Secret Strength of Passivity
Not too long ago I was told that I was perceived as passive. Most people who know me will probably be surprised to hear this, but I wasn’t that surprised because I had been passive […]
People Will Show You Who They Are
People Will Show You Who They Are If someone tells you they’re unreliable, believe them. If someone tells you they’re going to harm you or others, believe them. If someone tells you about their lies, […]
The Ripple Effect of the Woody Allen Culture
When I was a teenager, Woody Allen movies were the available cinema for a small-town kid with hopes of becoming an intellectual. But, looking back, I wish I had never heard of him. I think […]
The Fallacy of the Chaotic Creative
I recently read the tidying book that was so popular a couple of years ago (yeah, I’m always behind with the best sellers), “The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up.” I have always been quite tidy, […]
Blogging Paralysis
Blogging Paralysis In the summer of 2016 I was working on my second novel, and let my blog lapse, for what I thought would be short break. Weeks turned into months, with an occasional post […]
My Summer Vacation – Foreign Extraction Edition, Part IX
In my last installment, we had made it to Manila on Thursday, but would need to wait until Saturday to fly out of Manila, and, we hoped, on to the States. We had spent a […]
My Summer Vacation – Foreign Extraction Edition, Part VIII
Hello readers, I’m back with more of my Philippines tale. In the last installment we had traveled from my brother’s village to the airport in Cagayan D’Oro and were waiting for our flight to Manila. […]
Just Keep Your Hands to Yourselves
We women are blamed for exciting desire. We are blamed for killing desire. In summary, anything that happens with desire – it’s on us. So many harassers. Falling like dominoes as their victims, backing each […]
My Summer Vacation – Foreign Extraction Edition, Part VII
In the last installment our brother had decided to come with us, we had worked out travel plans, and were getting ready to embark on a “tour du village” so he could say goodbye to […]
My Summer Vacation – Foreign Extraction Edition, Part VI
At the end of my last installment we had traveled to Illigan City and procured cash and produce. The trip back was mostly uneventful. Night fell as we traveled back, but under the auspices of […]
My summer vacation – Foreign Extraction Edition, Part IV
Picking up where I left off (almost 2 weeks ago – sorry!), my stateside brother and I had just had a meal of fish and rice, followed by with some delicious pineapple pie, and were […]
My Summer Vacation – Foreign Extraction Edition, Part III
In last week’s installment, we had just wrapped up our brief adventure in Narita, Japan and were headed back to the airport to fly to Manila. After a leisurely and somewhat circuitous trip to see […]
My summer vacation – Foreign Extraction Edition, Part II
left off I left off as my stateside brother and I finalized our plan to travel to the Philippines to retrieve my Philippines-dwelling brother from near a war zone. I have flight benefits through my […]
My Summer Vacation – Foreign Extraction Edition, Part I
How did everyone’s summer go? Did you get out to the beach? Have some BBQs? Do some camping? Kayaking? Bike riding? How about that eclipse? That was something, huh? I did manage to do most […]
What We Really Mean by States’ Rights
I was talking to someone about the Civil War, and Lincoln and what the war meant to either side. To me, it seems clear that it was about one faction wanting to continue to exploit […]
Are You Scared Yet?
In what is by now old news, last weekend a few hundred heavily armed neo Nazis, white supremacists and members of the deceptively named “alt-right” marched in Charlottesville, Virginia. After weeks’ long period of relative […]
Your Standards Will Save You
Very many years ago, in the early days of the internet, I got semi-catfished. The guy was real (truly, some friends met him at a later point) but was not at all what he claimed […]
You Say Control Like it’s a Bad Thing
People talk about those who like to be in control, as if it’s a negative trait. “Oh, she doesn’t like going to the doctor, because she likes to be in control.” Etc. You know what? […]
Policing Our Two Americas
When I was a kid, growing up with an alcoholic father and a mother who enabled him (consciously or unconsciously I was never sure), sometimes we would find ourselves, the 6 of us, crammed into […]
I Thought I Was Done Dealing with Teenagers
Regular readers of my blog might remember that I dealt with some immature characters while I was in airplane mechanic school. The kids in my class sometimes frustrated me, sometimes amused me and sometimes pissed […]
Difficult People
When I was in college, I had a few friends who were considered “difficult people.” Not by me, mind you. Coming from a crazy home as I did, I didn’t even notice that these people […]
In the Soup
I’m working on a post about how to think critically and evaluate the sources of information. It’s taking some time, so in the meantime I’ll tell a story about some soup I tried to make […]
What is This Brain Sorcery?
When I was in A&P school I struggled a lot with the electrical portion of the training. I have always been good with concrete concepts rendered concretely, and abstract concepts rendered abstractly, but there was […]
Kids These Days, the Ballad of the Sad Countertop
I recently ordered new countertops for my house. When I had my kitchen remodeled in the early aughts I had a very constrained budget so a tile counter made a lot of sense. The person […]
Things I Don’t Understand – Hatred of the Press Edition
Someone posted in a Facebook group I belong to, about a conversation she had with a Homeland Security agent. The gist of it was that she asked what he was doing, he said he was […]
Running To Versus Running From
Years ago, while I was working the job that preceded my decision to leave corporate America in order to work on airplanes, a friend made the statement, “it’s always better to run to something that […]
What’s this “Dry Drunk” You’re Always Talking About?
After numerous conversations with friends in which I knowingly invoke the concept of the “dry drunk” only to be pressed for a definition, I’ve decided it’s a good topic for a blog post, since there […]
I’m Baaaack
Once upon a time I wrote a novel. I had never written an entire novel before so I wasn’t sure how to do it. I just opened up my subconscious and let it all tumble […]
Empowerment in the Age of the Supermodel
When I was in college I had a conversation with a guy once that went like this: Him: “It’s so strange, XXX (a mutual friend) knows who all the fashion models are. She knows their […]
To Be Young Again
I’m told I have some funny stories in me, and so begins a blog series of funny/poignant/ridiculous/illuminating stories from the archives of my brainpan. I’ll start with this one – in which my sister and […]
How to Do a Live Story
I missed my Wednesday post this week, but I have a reason. I was hard at work on a story for the Moth Story Slam. If you’ve never heard of it, it’s an offshoot of […]
The Power of Apology
Several times a month, if not every week, there’s a story in the news about an apology that’s not really an apology. A “sorry-not-sorry” if you will. Sports figures are caught doping or abusing the […]
No Excuse Needed
If you participate in any sort of organized fitness, the concept of excuses comes up from time to time – if, for example, you decide to skip a workout. Or eat a doughnut. I used […]
Unearthing the Past
I spent most of my free time this week going through old family photos, letters and assorted mementos. A few years ago I became the custodian of these materials, distributed among several large and decrepit […]
Pantsing versus Plotting and the Emergence of a New Work Style
As I have mentioned in previous posts, I’m working on the sequel to Raising John. As I have not yet mentioned, I recently made a commitment to my book manager at Booktrope to publish it […]
Random Thoughts on Judgment, Paleo and Grammar
I have this folder called “Post Ideas.” This is where I dump blog post ideas when I have a flash of inspiration but I’m not in a position to write the post right then. Sometimes […]
How Not to be a Horrible Customer or Client
I have several friends who are consultants and one who owns her own specialty construction business. Oh, the stories they tell of customers from hell. Here’s how not to be that customer: If they give […]
Holy Intrusiveness Batman! Or, How to Defend your Borders
I had an experience recently that made me really glad of the work I have done to learn about personal boundaries and how to enforce them. Someone I encounter in my daily life decided that […]
Top 5 Signs that You’re Being Manipulated
Another thing about growing up crazy is that oftentimes people with mental illness or severe emotional problems are adept at manipulating other people in order to get their own needs met. This can happen because […]
My Life Hacks
When I was a kid, there was a thing called “helpful hints.” They were collected and disseminated by nice housewifely ladies. Now we have “life hacks” and they’re created and distributed by irony-loving millennials. I’m […]
Six Ways from Dysfunction
Think about what slice you use to measure your life. For a while I did Crossfit, and now I do Olympic weightlifting. I’m not really the typical body type or age (or personality) for these […]
Random Thoughts of a Jet-Lagged, Newly Minted Night Shift Worker
I just started my night shift hours hot on the heels of 2 weeks spent 9 time zones away. I’m adjusting, but barely, so here’s a collection of random thoughts. I spent most of my […]
You Always Have a Choice
Back when I was in college (the first time) I worked at the Chicago UPS on the night shift. I started working there about 9 months after I departed the cornfields of my small Indiana […]
The Possible Will Take a Little While
Back when I was working at Microsoft I had no free time because I was working all the time. Then I left Microsoft and looked forward to having lots of time to catch up on […]
Time is Going to Pass Regardless
In 4.5 weeks I will be done with airplane school. I mean, really, really done. Finit. It’s kind of blowing my mind because it really does feel as if I started just a few days […]
Goals of the Achievable Sort
About a year ago I got a fitbit. For the uninitiated, it’s a device you either clip to your clothes or wear on your wrist to track activity. I got it because I suspected I […]
Update on Some Random Stuff
A while back I mentioned that I am going to republish Raising John through Booktrope. I am really excited about this opportunity, but I am having to rein in my excitement until I can find […]
Fixing – Not Just for Airplanes
Two things that have changed significantly since I left Microsoft and started airplane mechanic school: I have more time to do things around the house, because I no longer work punishingly long days; I know […]
The Power of Habit, or Five Simple Things You Can Do to Improve Your Life Starting Today
I have never been one to do New Year’s resolutions. This is partly because I don’t believe in waiting for an arbitrary date to make improvements, but it’s also, more importantly, that I don’t believe […]
As the Propeller Turns – Stuff Gets Real Edition
I’m in the last week of my penultimate quarter of airplane mechanic school. Fun times. Here’s a sampling of occurrences since last week: Apparently I upset my classmate, Young Guy Who Acts Like a Crabby […]
As the Propeller Turns – Human Factors Edition
I have a classmate (known in other posts as Young Guy Who Acts Like a Crabby Old Guy) who flies into a rage every time I suggest that I know something he doesn’t know, or […]
As the Propeller Turns – Inappropriate Conversation Edition
Last week’s post about a day in the life of an airplane mechanic student was so popular, I’m back this week with more snippets from my favorite conversations. There was this one: Man-Child to me: […]
Why and How I Write
In honor of hitting my 200 blog post milestone, I wrote this post in response to the question: “explain how you write and what inspires you.” A little over ten years ago, after saying for […]
Traveling, Writing, and Following Your Dreams
I wrote this in response to the question, “How has travel influenced your writing?” Some people know where they’re going in life from a very young age. When I was in first grade, I planned to […]
GoFundMe Campaign: Help a Student Out
Reminder: I’m reading at Third Place Books in Ravenna, TONIGHT, Wednesday, September 17 at 7 PM. Details here. Now to my blog post: Dear Readers – I don’t normally use my blog to make fundraising […]
Lives Real and Imagined
Today I visited the campus of my alma mater. I hadn’t been here since the last reunion, and being here on a non-reunion day is quite a bit different, and being here between school sessions […]
My Week of Living Dangerously
Last week I discovered the hazards of packing one’s laptop in the front pocket of one’s suitcase. And then checking said suitcase. No, my laptop didn’t get stolen (Alaska Airlines, if anyone’s keeping track), it […]
For Anyone Who Fails at Constant Happiness
Does anyone else feel like we’re under constant pressure to be happyhappyhappy all the time? Find joy in every moment! Be present and mindful! Find your true calling! Kick that depression to the curb! All […]
Best Day Ever
In life, you can go with the safe option, and know that you’ll be able to predict how most of your future days will go. Or you can toss the safe option out the window, […]
My Visit to the Alternative Physics Garage
This week’s post is a lighthearted answer to the question: What if we treated our cars the way we treat our bodies? Please note that this is a satirical post and does not represent actual events. […]
When You Have the Attention Span of a Gnat
A friend and I were talking about the challenges of getting things done when you have a short attention span. I was reminded of this little “day in the life” account I wrote a few […]
The Two Facial Expressions That Stop Stupidity Cold
I was going to share this with some friends, but then I realized it would make a great public service announcement. I have recently noticed that there are a lot of people who aren’t comfortable […]
Let Me Tell You How Much I Hate Painting
I’m kind of phoning it in this week because I have used up all my free time painting my living room and hallway. I hate painting. It always takes longer than I think it will. […]
No One Can Take This from You
Do you ever feel badly about yourself because of traits that are perceived from the outside? Your looks? Your body? The prestige (or lack thereof) associated with your career? Yeah, me too. I think we […]
Slow is Smooth and Smooth is Fast
Back in the 90s Jeffrey Mayer wrote If You Haven’t Got the Time to Do It Right, When Will You Find the Time to Do It Over? The title was based on a quote attributed […]
Who Ya Calling Bossy?
Last week I exhorted women to stop worrying about treading in men’s space and just go and claim what they want. Long ago, I wrote about how all of us, men and women, should think […]
Why You Should Wear Pink To Work on Airplanes (If That’s What You Want to Do)
In a few weeks I will be competing in the annual Aerospace Maintenance Competition. A year ago I didn’t even know such a thing existed. I’m nervous – I need to improve my skills in […]
You Go to War With the Army You Have
Back in the early aughts, Donald Rumsfeld, defending the troops’ shortage of armor and supplies in Iraq, was quoted as saying “you go to war with the army you have.” When we’re talking about sending […]
Five 100-Word Thoughts For a Wednesday
I think my brain/mouth filter went a little haywire when I turned 40. And I never bothered to have it repaired. There’s something to be said for just telling it like it is, although not […]
Ten Small Habits to a Bigger Life
I often get asked how I have time to do the things I do – write, go to school, mountain bike, maintain a reasonably orderly home and life … yeah, I am pretty productive, but […]
“Do What You Love” – Nice Work if You Can Get It
Last week Slate ran this article. Its point is that the aphorism to “do what you love” is steeped in the oblivion of privilege and that it’s insulting to those who must, simply, work. Given […]
The Often Convoluted Road to Indie Publishing a Book
I’m finally done. Galleys proofed, cover finalized, acknowledgements made. I’m ready to publish my book! I’ll have a link up soon, but in the meantime, you might be interested in hearing what all goes into […]
Radical Detachment
We humans don’t always make the best decisions. We throw good money after bad. We fail to save for a rainy day. We don’t floss as often as we should. We do the same thing […]
Notes from the Trenches of Indie Publishing
Happy New Year, readers. My first novel releases on January 25. Here are some things I have learned on the way to indie publication. 1. In the old days you pounded the pavement with your […]
In Honor of NaNoWriMo
Back in the days when I did NaNoWriMo yearly I developed a strategy that helped me keep writing when my ideas dried up: two characters, the writer and the therapist. They got together whenever I needed to […]
The Biker’s Story of Job
Dear Readers, I am knee-deep in revisions of my fiction manuscript, so I’m reaching back into my personal archives for today’s post. I wrote this nearly 15 years ago in an attempt to capture the […]
A Novel’s Worth of Blog Posts
Dingdingdingdingding! I have reached a milestone. This is my hundredth blog post. Do I get a prize? Does the International Blog Registry hand out plaques or commemorative clocks for this achievement? No? OK, I’ll just […]
Are You Productive, or Are You Just Busy?
I have been thinking about this lately, because as I have become less busy, I have become protective of my free time, not because I require vast tracts of empty space on my calendar for […]
Slow Food and Poverty in America – Part II
Continued from last week as our intrepid factory worker tries to shop local at the farmers’ market … Buy a few bunches of carrots (your kid loves carrots). Ask for a bag because you’re not going to […]
Slow Food and Poverty in America – Part I
Recently I read this article in the Atlantic. In summary, the author posits that the vast majority of Americans eat big-agra food and this is not likely to change, so the best way to address […]
My Two-Wheeled Friend
I owe a dear friend an apology. I neglected this friend for far too long. I hope I will be forgiven and we can go on as before. Back when I was working long hours […]
The Deprivation/Freedom Equation
Twenty frozen bananas cascaded out of my freezer the other day. As they ricocheted off my feet and skittered across the kitchen floor I was reminded of something I have known at various times in […]
Empowerment Beats Defensiveness Every Time
“It’s not my fault.” We learn this phrase early and use it often throughout life. It seems like a safe harbor from blame, but it can be crippling. We say it’s not our fault because […]
Cats Don’t Think About Body Image
My cat Abigail looks like a bowling ball with legs. She’s very active and the vet says she’s in good health, but I doubt she will ever be waspish. She doesn’t care. Abigail owns any […]
You Get What You Pay For – Or Do You?
By now I have done it all ways. I have been really poor, I have been in-between, and I have been flush. In my early adult life I had so little money that sometimes I […]
Revenge and Empathy
In last week’s post, I wondered what would make someone do something as hateful as the Boston Bombing. A reader commented that it doesn’t matter why, that the most important thing is to kill those […]
Not Again
At first I read the headlines figuratively – remembering how last year many runners suffered acutely from the heat, and not having the context to conceive of an actual bombing at the Boston Marathon, I […]
We’re All Entitled to This
I drafted this post almost a year ago, but have debated publishing it because it’s so personal. I decided to go ahead with it because 20 years ago, reading something like it would have given […]
Sometimes You Just Have to Punt
Another thing that’s better about getting older is that you have had enough time and experience to figure out what works and what doesn’t. You’ve had a chance to figure out what behaviors bring people […]
Jennifer’s 2012 in Review:
Went to Kenya – Y Saw elephants, giraffes and zebras – Y Got eaten by a lion – N Met an authentic example of a bitter, pickled, post-colonial European – Y Visited some classic Olympic […]
Peace
I had some travel posts in the works, but this week it seemed wrong to post a about anything lighthearted so soon after the horrible tragedy in Connecticut. I think anyone who has any connection […]
Whole-Ass One Thing
In season 4 of “Parks and Recreation” Leslie Knope’s boss Ron Swanson advises her, “never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing.” One difficulty of modern life is that there are so many ways to spend […]
Has It Really Been a Year Already??
Just about one year ago, I started this blog. It has been a lot of fun and it has been a great way to exercise my writing and thinking muscles. It has also been very […]
You Might as Well …
You might as well like yourself because, really, what is the alternative? You might as well like your body, because it’s the only one you’ve got. You’ll be sorry when it’s gone, so be nice […]
Why Getting Older Really IS Better than the Alternative
Aging has been a popular topic lately among my peers. Many of us are about halfway through our lives and we’re noticing and bemoaning the effects of the years that have gone past. Creaky joints, […]
Reality-based Time Management
The clock – who doesn’t hate the clock? Its hands move too quickly; there is never enough time left on it; it ticks away on the wall, reminding us of our mortality (or that we’re […]
The Denial Toilet
I think each and every one of us has overflowed the denial toilet at least once. You know how it goes: you’re in a situation that’s maybe not the best thing for you, but there […]
Do What You Do Well, and the Confidence Will Follow
After a couple of decades of “Best Participant” trophies and endless congratulations to kids for just getting out of bed and existing every day, the experts have finally started cautioning against too much positive reinforcement. […]
In My Day …
I’m going to sound old here, but I can remember when I was in high school you would get your wardrobe at the beginning of the school year and that was it. You would get […]
As Entitled As
This Easter, there were several well-circulated stories about the cancellation of municipal Easter egg hunts in Colorado and Georgia because parents, eager to ensure that their kids got the most eggs, had caused a shameful ruckus in prior […]
Let Simple Things be Simple – Part II
Last week I debated a bike shop kid about the necessity to treat wheel-building as a complicated dark art. We pick up after I left the wheel with the kid, who swore that he would […]
Let Simple Things be Simple, or, The Easy Pleasure of Cold-Brewed Coffee
I ride bikes, which means I sometimes need to replace my wheels. Because hand-built wheels last longer than machine built wheels and because I’m a geek and a cheap one at that, I have built […]
Reality is the Higher Power
Addiction is one of the themes of my novel. All of the characters are affected by addiction either directly or indirectly. There’s also some stuff about 12-step programs. Before you click away from my blog […]
Stupid Robbers
I had planned to publish the next in my Waterfall series this week, but I got a little off schedule because, upon returning from a 3-day weekend away, I found that my house had been broken […]
Don’t Stop the Train
I’m a closet advice column junkie. Carolyn Hax, Ask Amy, and Margo Howard – I read them all. I still read Cheryl Lavin’s Tales from the Front, which started in the Chicago Tribune right around […]
The Distractible Mind
I think I might have ADD, but I’m not sure. There’s a test, but I haven’t been able to sit still long enough to take it. But seriously folks, I have often wondered if I […]
2011 in Review
Y Invested in the future of container housing Y Became a faster cyclist N Became a fast cyclist Y Experimented with outsourcing some drudgery Y Discovered the joys of root vegetable soups N Discovered the joys of […]
Samsonspite
Sometimes I think I should move to a cabin in the mountains where I can sit on a porch with a shotgun across my knees and blast away at anything that annoys me. The older […]
The Zen of Fall Color and Summer Berries
Like everyone else in the Northern Hemisphere, I have been enjoying the fall colors. A boulevard runs through my neighborhood, lined with young maples that turn the most amazing colors. There are shocking reds that […]
Jennifer Lesher 